On the Market: Pacific Heights Manse Seeks Victorian Enthusiast and $5.5M

× Like us and you'll find top breaking news in your Facebook newsfeed. Sign up for our daily email newsletter and get top stories and breaking news delivered to your inbox. Wednesday, September 26, 2012, by Sally Kuchar Broker babble tells us that this big abode is "grand and elegant," and we're going to have to agree. So grand and elegant, that we'd feel bad if we wanted to switch out the Louis XVI stool for something a little more modern like an Eames LCW chair. And yes, while we understand that the furnishings are not included in the sale, it's hard to imagine this home without all its glamourous antiques. The 5-bed, 4.5-bath, 5,000 sq. ft. home just landed on the market asking $5,500,000. The original details have been meticulously preserved, but "tasteful updates" have been added. Property highlights include over four fireplaces and a legal inlaw apartment to help with those mortgage payments. The only bummer we can find is that there appears to be no elevator in the 5+ story house.
· 2053 Vallejo [Redfin] 2053 Vallejo Street, San Francisco, CA

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That's Rather Hideous: Toile-decked Condo Seeks Your Fancy Attention

× Like us and you'll find top breaking news in your Facebook newsfeed. Sign up for our daily email newsletter and get top stories and breaking news delivered to your inbox. Tuesday, January 3, 2012, by Abby Pontzer Today we bring you a 2-bed, 2-bath condo on the tippy top of Nob Hill across the street from Huntington Park and Grace Cathedral. It's listed for a mere $2,750,000 and boasts a very pinkies-up location and some killer views of the bay. Of course, we're not crazy about the HOA at a thumbs-down amount of $2,220 per month, and less crazy still about some of the decor. There's an awful lot of carpet, though it looks to be in good shape, and some seriously questionable window treatments. We can't even bring ourselves to talk about the matchy-matchy toile explosion bedroom and bath. We hope that someone will make like Maria in The Sound of Music and make dresses for the children out of those curtains. What are your ideas for the rest of the decor left behind for the lucky buyer? Please, dear readers, think of the children.
· 1150 Sacramento St #303 [Price Squares] 1150 Sacramento Street, San Francisco, CA

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Sandra Lee Seeks New Publisher: Defining housewares designer of our generation...

× Like us and you'll find top breaking news in your Facebook newsfeed. Sign up for our daily email newsletter and get top stories and breaking news delivered to your inbox. Wednesday, December 7, 2011, by Sarah Firshein

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Craigslist Chorales: "Most Kick-Ass Fucking Roommate That Ever Lived" Seeks Home

× Like us and you'll find top breaking news in your Facebook newsfeed. Sign up for our daily email newsletter and get top stories and breaking news delivered to your inbox. Friday, August 19, 2011, by Sarah Firshein

Enthusiasm is rare on sleepy, sweltering Friday afternoons, which is why the person who took to Craigslist with an unbridled zest for life deserves some due attention. The posting, which first surfaced on Gizmodo, was written by a 25-year-old "professional marketing agent with experience at bad-ass companies in New York Fucking City." (Sorry to offend, but the F-bomb appears 16 times in his ad. Brace.) Anyway, this fella is headed out to San Francisco and has $1,000 per month to spend on shared housing. Some of his selling points: he turns off lights, he cleans toilets, he even cooks—"I'll fry green tomatoes, cover them with marinated crab meat and smother that shit in bearnaise. EVERY. GODDAMN. NIGHT." Plus—and this is really a big one—he's not racist: "A lot of people ask me, 'Hey, you're from Alabama. Are you racist?' And, the answer to that question is, no. I'm not racist or judgmental at all. I love everyone. I'm a secular humanist. I FUCKING LOVE PEOPLE." He implores interested parties to email him, after which he'll provide all his vital stats: "I'll hook yo ass up with Facebook links, background checks, credit reports, phone numbers, resumes, references, awards, sexual history, pictures of karate trophies and a list of the top 10 women I'd like to bang before I die." We're done with this clown: just read the full post below.

· $1000 Best. Roommate. Ever. [Craigslist San Francisco via Gizmodo]

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Best Roommate Ever Seeks Shelter: With SF rent prices sky-high as...

× Like us and you'll find top breaking news in your Facebook newsfeed. Sign up for our daily email newsletter and get top stories and breaking news delivered to your inbox. Monday, August 22, 2011, by Sally Kuchar

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On the Market: Prim and Proper Co-op Seeks Well-Heeled Buyer

× Like us and you'll find top breaking news in your Facebook newsfeed. Sign up for our daily email newsletter and get top stories and breaking news delivered to your inbox. Wednesday, May 11, 2011, by Sally Kuchar Want a sliver of one of San Francisco's early stock cooperatives? 2164 Hyde was built by Patterson Ross on Russian Hill in 1915. Apartment #202, which is a 2-bed, 2-bath, 1,800 square foot unit, is on the market asking $1,695,000. Got enough change in your pockets to make an offer? Not so fast. You have to be a certain type of pedigree to score this address. The type that the board approves of. So no flip flops and shaggy hairstyles, please. Poodles are encouraged, as is mentioning something like "we're moving out of Billionaire's Row. We just can't handle the Ellison acacia and redwoods drama anymore!" The unit has big windows, big views and a monthly HOA dues of $1,000. Would you like to see some floorplan porn? Follow us.

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